Eversince 2010 started, I felt like my world is stumbling down on me. Felt like God's so far away to reach. Felt like He didn't hear me whenever I called Him. But today I was reassured that God still hears me. He listens to every prayer I make. Even the slightest problem I had, He didn't just hear me, but He answered my prayers. It happened today. And this thought came to my mind, that He's with me.
Love this feeling when I know that He's so near to me that I can even whispher to Him. Before this I struggle ALOT to just get back the security I had in Him. I was just blinded by so many things. But sometimes I forget too. I still feel like a rebel. Anyway..... There are still things that I struggle with. Sometimes I don't feel like i'm qualified to be a shepherd at all! Look at me......
Anyway, like Iris said, loving God first, then loving people. I want to experience the love God has for me again, I want to understand it. It's not that I don't know the love He has for me. I just want to feel refreshed again. By His Love and His Grace and everything of His.
Guess I shouldn't limit the time I spend with His word. I always make it before I sleep, after all works. But I only end up getting sleepy. Bad idea. Yea. I also realize that I lack alot of wisdom, like.... ALOT. Haha. It's okay, it just means that I have to rely ALOT MORE on Him. Which is better than relying on your own ability. :D
My cat had a shower today, she smells good, and she's sleeping with me on my bed tonight! Her ang pao is food. Haha. Excited for church later. Good night.
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