love.

I slept late yesterday, and I've been active eversince I woke up until right now. My eyes are bad, my face is bad, my mind is.... Busy.


I had no idea what gotong-royong would be like. We cleaned the CF pond! CJ was the 'man' to take off his shoes and went into the dirty pond first. He was a 'manly' example to the other soon-to-be-mans'. So how did I really contribute? I stood there cheering for those who are tired scooping the water out with a cangkul. LOL. At least they had something to laugh at :P 2 baby fish died. I was their granny. They died in my hands. :'( It's actually the chlorine water from the pipe. Haih, so I burried them with the hands that killed them!!! Noooooo!!!!!!!



So that was about it. And we did absolutely nothing until school ended. So let's talk about CF where it gets touchy. After everything ended, Elaine lead prayer meeting. She told us that God told her many great things about CF and that God wanted her to stay for it. So the prayer meeting was more focused on evangelism, and as we prayed and sang.... My heart was.... So heavy, burdened and broken? I don't know. It was a deep rush. And I started tearing when nobody was. I really couldn't understand why was I feeling that way, but I know it's the Holy Spirit. *that is why I couldn't understand it in the first place* I couldn't stop, and it got worst. So Elaine asked me to pray after Jojo, and when I prayed, "BOOOM!!" It was a deep cry out to God.



Many people came to my mind, the homeless, the unloved, and even the unlovable, the people who are just waiting to die, hopeless, thinking, nobody on earth care about their existence, I felt the brokenness. I didn't know why I was crying for them, so suddenly. But I didn't stop myself, and I just flow with it. That's where friends around me started crying too, oh no, created an emo aura, HAHA. Well, I can't forget about it. It's a sudden urge, calling, to serve, to reach out, to touch, to heal, to bring home the lost, to LOVE. Guess what Ps Reynold said was trully TRUE. It's the year of evangelism. 1-2-1, 1-4-1. Oh boy! We better get started!



So my eye is bengkak from the late night sleep to the sobbing, to the 'never resting eyes'. Due to reading u see, haha. Now that i'm motivated, i'll pray that i'll add more chacoal to my fire so that it burns BIGGER! In the same time, many MANY things are bringing me DOWWNNNN. It's so true where people say that the enemy attacks when we are at our highest. hmphs.


Well, I can still choose not to think about them now. I'll hold on to whatever that I've seen this afternoon. Amen.