Determined But Not Motivated

Another busy day.......
Not that bad, but I just felt that I'm packed with tons of things to do today, tomorrow, and the following day, the following week, the following month! So I took out a pen and a paper and wrote down ALL the things that needs to be done.

1) Thurs 2/7 ...............
2) Fri 3/7 ...............
3) Sat 4/7 ...............

After thinking and thinking... I've decided to really use my time wisely. Coz I'm really lacking of it. It's so hard to say no when someone asks me for help or to be in charge of something or anything at all, especially things in church and CF. As for class, I can't escape it, because they blame me if anything goes wrong x_x And all I do is just :

"Huey Wern, can u be in charge in this ********* event?"
Cool! Okays!
"Huey Wern, do you want to be involved in this ******** ******* *** performance?"
I'd love to!!
"Huey Wern, do you want to help out in a **** ******* event?
Yes yes...
And the most foolish thing I ever did was: (proudly proclaim)
(After training in Camerons, at a river washing up)
Kimberly: "Huey Wern, can you please help me take my slippers here? I don't want my legs to be dirty :("
Sure :)) (walks 200M to that place and walks 200M back with her slippers) I remembered this bcz my other friend scolded me for being so stupid, lols.


And so after realizing, I just don't know when to start, because it feels like my schedule is always full and I can't just empty it suddenly. During Moral class, teacher announced that there will be an inter class choir competition for school National Day. And when teacher asked: "Who will take charge of this?" And people around me was already shouting "HUEY WERN!!!!" While I was busy trying to complete my Moral Project. When I thought about it, I was already thinking, "Ooo we can combine this and that song, the girls can do this, the guys can do that, we can do this action to make it look interesting, if we practice, sure can win wan....." But suddenly teacher said that the audition is in the mid of July. It totally shut me off. :/


So I took a deep breath... And said NO, I CAN'T. But i'm actually glad that I can reject something for my own time's sake. And so I asked Michelle to do it. I know she can!! She taught me a song on the piano too :)) So it seems like I just have to think twice before saying 'yes!' or 'ok!!'. Also to cut down on my non-important-stuffs but enjoyable like yum cha & outings. I know i'll be tempted to go but it's just SO HARD for me to not join my friends :(((( I hope I won't be like Kheng or Jojo, totally gone to the desert already. lols.


And so tomorrow will be another day... Oh wait, it's pass 12 already.

And so today will be a new day... New desicions to make, new commitments to make? If it's worth it. Arrghh... Need motivation.