Who You Are

I don't know what kind of ride that i'm on, but it's surely tough. Nobody said it was easy, and I was already warned that it'll be tough.

I used to have everything, well almost everything. And now I lost almost everything.. I don't know what i'm suppose to feel.

I can't even face myself, with all the shyt that I carry along with me. I can't face my weaknesses, and struggles, and also, failures. I can't really believe myself when I thought about how I used to be, so joyful and hopeful, confident and passionate. Now i'm so deadly, so afraid, so vulgar, so pessimistic, nothing like how I used to be. Why..... What am I suppose to learn from this? I'm no better than the devil... I turned my back against someone who has never failed to love me. Rejected Him, and accused Him. Who am I to say all these to the Almighty God? The One who created the Heavens and the Earth...


And now when I almost lose one of the things that I have left, I remembered God again. It's like, God had to die on the cross for me over and over again, because of all my sins that I kept repeating and repeating. I can't face God, I can't face my friends, I can't even face myself.


How can You be for me still, after all the things that I have done.....
In this whole world, it is only You that can bear with me and the rest of my nonsense...
Even when I come back, You greet me with open arms, even when I'm so dirty...
Who is this God that has so much grace?
This is our God...