Guess I'm just too bitter from all the hurts and disappointments that I unleash my anger inside of me towards the people that I love. I feel like a beast, or a monster, whenever my angry button is triggered. I felt that I have so much self defense mechanism that I can break things, and even kill. Have you seen a woman Hulk?
Maybe less intimidating, but sexier.
Ooh yeah! Break those walls!
That feeling is uncontrollable. Well i'm not trying to give an excuse for reacting the way I did, but it's just too damn hard to think things out in a more calm, rational way. I would rather just flip the table and break things because that would satisfy part of what I feel inside, but it always has to end with regrets.
I feel like a prisoner to my very own mind and feelings. How ironic it is for a person that studies about the mind and behavior to feel this way. The other prisoners would be the people that still chose to love me and be with me although they have seen the ugly side of me.
It hurts both ways. Let's just end the war.
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